be more attractive: How to Overcome a Fear of Flying

Do you wish you could travel to faraway places and see the world -- without having a panic attack? If you have aviophobia, or the fear of flying, there are ways you can prevent it from negatively affecting your life. Facing the facts, using relaxation techniques and taking medication are all ways you can overcome your fear and be free to explore the world. Here's one fact that can get you going: your chances of dying in a plane crash are about 1 in 11 million. That's a whopping 0.00001% chance that something will go terribly wrong on your flight.^[1] See? You're feeling better already.

Steps

Arming Yourself with Knowledge

Arm yourself with statistics. Sure, a statistic may not be able to completely save you when your plane leaves the runway, but knowing as much information about how safe it really is to fly in an airplane can go a long way in making you feel more comfortable on your flight as well as on your way to the airport. The fact of the matter is that flying is really, really safe -- it's by far the safest mode of transportation. Here are some things you can learn, write down, and repeat to yourself when you start to worry about what will happen on your next flight:^[2]
- To repeat, your chances of dying in a plane crash are 1 in 11 million. That's a 0.00001% chance that something will go wrong.
- Your chances of being killed in an automobile accident are 1 in 5000. That means that the most dangerous part of your flight is your drive to the airport. Once you've made the drive to the airport, pat yourself on the back. You've just made it through the most dangerous part of your flight.
- You also have a higher chance of dying of food poisoning than in a plane crash (your chances spike up to 1 in 3 million). This means that you have a better chance of dying from food poisoning from the airplane food than from the actual flight. And no, this isn't meant to make you feel anxious about the food; it's meant to show you how unfounded your worries really are!
- You also have a better chance of dying of a snake bite, getting hit by lighting, dying of scalding of hot water or falling off your bed, and even, if you're a leftie, from using right-handed equipment, than you do of dying in a plane crash. Have you ever worried about these other things? Of course not, because they are extremely unlikely to happen. And this is even more true for flying in a plane.

Know what to expect. A large part of being scared is not knowing what will happen next. Why is the plane going so fast? Why do my ears feel funny? Why does the wing look weird? Why are we hitting turbulence? Why are we being asked to keep our seat belts on? When presented with an unusual circumstance, your first instinct is to assume the worst. To minimize this, learn everything you can about flying and how a plane works. The more you know, the less uncertainly there will be for you to worry about. Here are some things you should know:
- The plane needs to reach a certain speed so that it can take off. That's why you may feel like the plane is going super-sonically fast. It is.
- Your ears pop when the plane moves up or down because of a change in pressure.
- Certain parts of the wing are supposed to move during the flight. That's perfectly normal.
- Turbulence occurs when a plane flies through an area of low pressure to high pressure, which will make you feel a "bump" in the ride. Turbulence has never taken down a commercial airliner, and 99% of people who are injured during turbulence feel it because they aren't wearing seat belts or were hurt by falling overhead luggage. Turbulence is just like driving on a rocky road.

Learn more about how a plane works. Hey, if you really want to arm yourself with knowledge, then you should learn about the inner-workings of a plane to demystify the process that has you so scared. Studies show that 73% of people who are afraid of flying fear the mechanical problems that can occur during a flight. So, the more you know about how a plane works, the more at ease you'll feel throughout the process instead of asking yourself, "Why is the plane doing that? Is that normal?" Here are some things you need to know:^[3]
- As one pilot said, "Planes are the happiest in the air." Four forces are at work to get the plane to fly, which are gravity, drag, lift, and thrust. These forces are destined to make your flight feel as natural and easy as walking. You can read up on the science behind this if you want to take your knowledge to the next level.
- Airplanes go through a ton of repair and upkeep procedures. For every hour that a plane flies in the air, it goes through 11 hours of maintenance. This means that, if your flight is three hours long, the plane has gone through 33 hours of maintenance to make sure everything is working smoothly! If that sounds like a super long time, that's because it is.
- Jet engines are much more simple than the engines you'll find in a car or even in a lawnmower. And in the extremely unlikely event that something goes wrong with a plane's engine, the plane will function just fine with its remaining engine.
- You should also curb your feat that a plane door can open during the flight. Once you reach 30,000 feet, there will be about 20,000 pounds of pressure holding the door shut, so that would be a tall order.^[4]

Managing Your Anxiety

Manage your general anxiety. People who are afraid of flying tend to have higher anxiety levels than average. If this is you, then you can go a long way in managing your anxiety about flying by being mindful about managing your anxiety in general. Doing things like learning to meditate, doing yoga, going for walks, or generally making time for relaxation can help you be less anxious overall. These practices are mindful and allow you to slow down while feeling in control of your thoughts.
- Another way to manage your anxiety is to lower your intake of caffeine, especially before flight time! Caffeine is proven to make you more anxious.
- If you think you experience serious levels of anxiety, then you should see a therapist to discuss treatment. Anti-anxiety medication should be considered only after trying all other measures. According to research at Stanford University School of Medicine, anti-anxiety medication blocks desensitization and increases sensitivity to flying. ^[5]
- Accept that you are not in control in certain situations, such as flying. Risk is a part of life. You never know what's right around the corner. Fear is all about anticipating, worrying, and wanting to control the future. Once you become more comfortable with the idea that what will be will be, flying will not be as much of a threat to your peace of mind.

Practice visualization. Along with learning to slow down and meditate, you can practice positive visualization before you get on a plane, so that you feel like you know what to expect. In other words, before you step onto a plane, learn how to control your thoughts. Sit down in a chair, close your eyes, and pretend you are on a plane. When something strikes your fear and you start feeling anxious, try to stop the thought process--the imagery--from funneling out of control.
- Think about something else you're excited about, or at least something that will take your mind off of your fears.
- Listen to yourself breathe.
- Recite the alphabet backwards.
- Count to 5,000.

See a doctor to inquire about medication as a last resort. Just having the pills with you as a last resort can be a comfort, even if you don't end up using them. This is something you can consider if you feel like you've tried everything else and nothing has worked.

Take a class that can help you overcome your fear of flying. You may need to fork over some serious cash for one of these courses, but they do exist. There are two kinds of courses, those you attend and those you do at your own pace using videos, written materials and counseling sessions. Classes you attend help you get accustomed to flying by exposure to an airport and a flight with your class leader. Desensitization gained by taking a flight with your class leader does not last unless you maintain it by flying frequently. You can look into such group therapy classes in your area.^[6]Classes done at your own pace leave you in control of the process. And, since you retain the course materials, you can reinforce your learning by going through the materials periodically, and by additional counseling sessions.^[7] Some offer weekly group phone counseling sessions at no additional cost.^[8]
- Some can also help you by putting you in a flight simulator, which will also help you overcome your fears without taking a step off the ground.

Face your fear head-on by taking flying lessons. There are countless stories of people who've feared something all their lives only to meet it face-to-face one day and discover that the object of their fear was nothing to be afraid of. One way to conquer a phobia is to immerse yourself in it--in what you know is a safe situation (i.e. in the presence of trained professional). With the guidance of a patient instructor, you might find that flying isn't so scary after all. Though this is an extreme approach, it could be your way to easing your anxiety.

Avoid reading too much about plane crashes. If you want to stay calm on the subject, then there's no point in obsessing over plane crashes when they do happen in the news. These stories will not make you feel better, and will only add to your anxiety about an unlikely event occurring. The same goes for watching Flight or other movies about plane crashes or scary flights; if you know this is already something you are struggling with, avoid the temptation to indulge your fears.

Getting Prepared for the Flight

Choose your trip wisely. Though you have limited control once you get into the passenger seat in your plane, there are some things you can do in advance when you choose your flight that can ease your worries a bit. Here are some things you can try:^[9]
- Pick a direct flight. This is a no-brainer. The less time in the air, the better.
- Choose a seat over the wing. The passengers who sit here tend to have the smoothest flights.
- Choose a seat that will make you feel less trapped. Choose an aisle seat or even splurge on an exit row.
- Choose a larger flight with a larger plane. If there's a way to avoid puddle jumpers or smaller planes (you'll see information about the aircraft as you choose your flights), then do it. The bigger the plane, the smoother your flight will be.
- If you're afraid of flying at night, choose a daytime flight. Sometimes you can feel better because you'll be able to look out the windows and see everything around you. You may feel more anxiety in the dark because you'll feel like you're facing the unknown.
- You can even check out an online site about which parts of the country have the least turbulence. If you have to plan for a connecting flight, you can have some agency in choosing paths that are likely to give you less trouble.^[10]

Arrive early. Get to the airport early so you have time to experience the terminal, go through security, and find your gate. Being late, or just not having time to mentally prepare for what's ahead, is bound to make you feel more anxious when it's time to take your seat. Get used to the terminal, the people who are arriving and leaving the airport, and the general atmosphere at the airport. The more you get used to it, the better you'll feel when the time comes.
- Some people recommend you even visit the airport when you don't plan to fly. Just hang out in the terminals and get used to how things are there. This may sound extreme, but it's another way to slowly get comfortable with the flight at hand.

Get to know your flight attendants and the pilot. When you get on the plane, say hi to the flight attendants or even to the pilot. See them dressed in their uniforms, doing their jobs. Pilots receive tons of special training, just as a doctor does, and they are people you should respect and trust. If you practice having faith in these people, and understand that they have your best interests in mind and are competent, then you'll feel better about the trip.^[11]
- Your pilots will have a ton of experience in the air. They'll need to log 1,500 flight hours just to apply to work at a major airline.^[12]

Avoid self-medicating with alcohol. Many people start ordering a lifetime supply of wine or Bloody Marys as soon as the stewardesses make a first pass, but know that this is not a good long-term solution for easing your anxiety about flying. Alcohol can actually make you feel more anxious about being in less control, especially if you're worried about having to evacuate the plane, and it can lead to even more anxiety and stress. Plus, getting too drunk to worry can just make you feel terrible, and do you really want to do that every time you fly?
- Though if you really need to calm your nerves and can drink in moderation, one glass of wine or a beer may not hurt.

Find anxiety-management techniques for the flight. You'll have to find what works best for you, but when you get on the plane, you should have a few tricks up your sleeve so you feel more able to deal with your own anxiety. Here are some tricks you can try:^[13]
- Take deep breaths. Slowly inhale through your nose, and exhale gently, counting to ten until you let all the air out of your lungs. Repeat as many times as necessary.
- Squeeze your arm rest. If you're feeling anxious, especially during takeoff or landing, then you should squeeze your armrest as hard as you can while tensing your stomach and muscles, and hold this potion for 10 seconds.
- Place a rubber band around your wrist. Snap it when you feel anxious; this little jolt of pain will help bring you back to reality.

Bring diversions. If you find as many ways to distract yourself as possible, then you'll be better off when the time to fly comes. Bring magazines, download those episodes of The Bachelor you've been meaning to catch up on and watch them on your computer, bring games to play, or just something extra fun you've wanted to do to keep yourself occupied. You can also bring work form the office or school work, which can certainly distract you, unless you feel unmotivated to do it! Find whatever works for you, so you can look at your time in the air as a time to do some of the things you've wanted or needed to do, instead of just several hours of unmitigated anxiety.
- If you're traveling alone, try striking up a conversation with the person next to you. This can help pass the time and may make you forget your fear.
- Bring some snacks. Distract yourself with a snack that takes a while to eat, or just with your favorite treat. Reward yourself for being brave enough to fly with a treat of your choice!
- Treat yourself to a trashy celebrity gossip magazine. You may be too distracted to do your chemistry homework, but you may have enough brainpower to read about Tori Spelling's troubled marriage or about the latest Real Housewives scandal.
- Some people even recommend that you show up to the plane after having woken up early, so it's more likely that you may even catch some shut eye during your flight. What better way to pass the time than to be asleep?

Fly as often as you can. Once you have a strategy for beating your fears on flight day, fly as often as you can. When you have a choice between flying and driving, choose flying just to tackle your fear more -- plus, remember that it's much safer to fly than it is to drive! Making a habit of flying will make it feel less like a scary, isolated event and more like a routine part of your day. Once you get into the habit of it, you'll start to feel more at ease with the process.^[14]